So, where was I? Oh yeah, the High Sheriffs at myspace kicked me off. Apparently they’ve rid their site of all the perverts trolling for underage tail and have set their sights on regular joe lunchbox trying to bring a little culture to the masses.  Know this O’ Myspace there will be justice…like lightning.

I’m gonna breeze through this LOST blog more than usual, for one thing It turned out that what I thought was LOST was actually GREY’S ANATOMY. Looking back, I see that now but in my defense both had annoying characters, polar bears and mysterious happenings.

I have to say I enjoyed the return last week of my favorite JACK, the one drunker than “Tony Stark”.  Man, that KATE sure can pick ’em. And a round of applause for the new character, that surly bad boy, JACK’S APPENDIX.


After JACK’S needlessly heroic operation I love him that much more. So LOCKE’S mom is apparently Joanie Cunningham’s slutty friend Jenny Picolo from TV’s “Happy Days” (also on ABC, well , 30 years ago). She gets knocked up and has premie LOCKE. Now I’m confused. Is LOCKE’S father BATMANUEL?  bm

Because that would be cool. So he may want to take LOCKE to the Xavier School for Weird Kids but then LOCKE picks the knife. I thought LOCKE’S dad was the guy SAWYER killed? Whatever. But then again, LOCKE’S granny didn’t recognize BATMANUEL so he probably is just an observer. Bottom line, they (Original Time Traveling Island Guys) have kept tabs on LOCKE.

Meanwhile, SAYID manages to look like he has a plan when clearly he does not. KEAMY, the crazy merc ain’t gonna let the obviously out of his weight class SMOKE MONSTER push him around.  MICHAEL still can’t be shot and has finally stopped wandering around saying “Walt” and “They took ma boy”.


I gotta say JEFF FAHEY is one of the best character actors around. So LOCKE, HURLEY and BEN wander around until GHOST BEN’S DAD tells him to wander around some more. LOCKE needs to find the dungeon master’s island map to the magic cabin. LOCKE’S real dad must be JACOB or something. KEAMY has a weird scene where he gets something strapped to him. Somehow everyone misses SAYID leaving in the raft.

Finally, CHRISTIAN SHEPHERD and his daughter CLAIRE are all cryptic and spooky in the cabin. If everyone would just knock off all the “Nostradamus” talk and speak clearly a lot of bullshit would be avoided. Turns out the best solution that time traveling, undead guys who control whatever the fuck the smoke monster is and would seem to be fairly formidable can come up with is to “move the island”. Okay. I would just kill the fairly incompetent mercenaries and be done with it but moving the island works too.


I think there are two more episodes before a seven month break which is good because I bet the internet geeks are still searching for shit like whose picture is in LOCKE’S locker and is the comic book BATMANUEL had real? If I was you, I would use the break to watch the awesome POPEYE Collection . It’s completely re-mastered and is amazing. The color cartoons are almost 3-D. Check out “King of Mardi Gras” or the “Sinbad” 17 minute short featured in this blog.




  1. best lost blog ever!

  2. so .. in addition to the black smoke monster … the other mystery to solve is when did Bluto become Brutus?

  3. Much cooler than Myspace, right? It’s good to have you back from the dead…

  4. Bluto-Brutus was a rights issue. And it also had something to do with time travel.

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